My turbulence morning

This morning. I hauled myself out of bed at 7am sharp sharp with a mission – Dress to kill.
 
 Oh. Why? To seduce your husband.
 
 

I put on my black stockings that I haven’t wash in two mths, followed by my uber hot, until cannot hot pants, complete with that match until cannot match off-white top.
 
*wolf whistler*
 
One word . No . Two words . SIBEI CHIO.
 
 
The euphoria lasted for another good whole ten mins, and yes, that was how long I was admiring myself shamelessly at my full length mirror. LOL.
 
Until everything started barreling downhill at warp speed, when I was testing out my new eye colour for that smoke-eye effect.
 
 
 
The supposedly smoke-eye effect became panda-eye effect.
 
My only consolation…The removing was a breeze with my Fancl Mild Cleansing Oil.
 
Please go and buy ok.
 
 
Sorry. Let’s not disgress. Back to my smoke-eye.
 
 
Just when I thought all I need was to re-apply the eye colour…and a little touch up on the eyebrow. I HAD TO USE MY EYELINER (instead of eyebrown pencil) TO DRAW MY BROWS.
 
 
OK. Fine. Nevermind. I got Fancl Mild Cleansing Oil mah. Vvvvvery easy one.
 
N-E-V-E-R-M-I-N-D!
 
Then this time, when I mananged to fish out the CORRECT eyebrow pencil. I HAD TO BREAK THE PENCIL INTO TWO WHILE SHARPENING IT.
 
*breathless with anger*
 
 
I tell you lor. Its really all I could do not to stuff the two broken pencils into my nostrils.
 
 
 
I’m now sans make-up, with my berms, T-shirt and flip-flops.
 
Remind me not to go out with my maid today. Wait people think I’m her sister.
 
 
 
 
It didn’t help either when I ask someone to guess my age yesterday, and he blurted out my age C-O-R-R-E-C-T-L-Y.
 
 
I always thought I look like 24 leh. No meh?
 
I went MOS the other time, and the bouncer checked my IC you know. YOU KNOW?
 
 
 
Can someone tell me, jump down the window faster or you come and stab me faster?

 

Handphones

Dad is finally back in town for a week. *pop champagne & set fireworks*
 
 
Don’t ask me why, what, where, how. He lost two handphones and a grand total of like SGD500 (or more) .

So. Off we went to purchase handphones.
 
 
And guess what.
 

 
My didi is now the proud owner of this spanking N95!
 
TMD. 5.1 megapixels camera and its a PC in a phone can!
 
 
If you think that’s all. NO!
 
 

 
My mama also got this kickass bloody new phone! So new, its not even officially launch can!
 
Come. I let you wow at the spec of my mama’s spanking new phone.
 
- Take high quality pictures with a 3.2 megapixel camera with Carl Zeiss optics, auto focus and 8 x digital zoom

- A powerful double LED flash makes even indoor pictures perfect

- Add a new dimension to your conversation with 3G TV video calling and TV conference via TV-Out

- 3G video calling helps you feel even closer to the people you care about

- Large 2.2″ display with 16.7 million colors makes sure all your images look perfect

- Horizontal mode with capture and zoom keys, allows you to use the phone like you would use a digital camera

- Connect directly to Flickr website to share your photos with all your friends

- Share pictures or videos with friends and family via TV-Out
 
 
All I wanna say is one word. No. Two words. T-O-T-A-L-L-Y  W-A-S-T-E-D.
 
All Mama does with her handphone is 1) receive calls and 2) sms “CALL ME NOW.
 
She don’t even call out, she will cleverly sms you “CALL ME NOW”.
 
Obviously her plan has free incoming lah. That cheapskate.
 
 
Dad lost his handphone, and apparently also a hefty sum of money. And yet the WWW now has a spanking new phone!
 
You tell me lah. WTF? You tell me. YOU TELL ME!
 
 
 Oh. You ask what about me huh?
 
 *cue sad opera music*
 
I have NOTHING. ZILCH. KOSONG. 零蛋 . 没有.
 
 
Even Tenia got some underwears and socks from Mothercare can.
 
Her poor mother has NOTHING. ZILCH. KOSONG. 零蛋 . 没有.
 
 
 
 
I can’t help but inclined to believe that my parents might have just picked me up from AMK Ave 10 rubbish chute.
 
 
DIDI has N95.
 
Mummy has Nokia 6500.
 
ME? NOTHING. ZILCH. KOSONG. 零蛋 . 没有
 
 
 
 
 
 
Hiazzzzzz. I ish bo lang ai.
 
 
 
LAI! RAPE ME! KILL ME! STAB ME!

 

*wave* I’M NOT DEAD! I’M BACK!

Excuse me! Don’t curse me hor! I’m still alive and kicking can!

For the past week…

• I was conned visited MOS for the first time.  And did I tell you… The bouncer made me a happy girl, when they checked my IC.   I mean. What to do. I look like eighteen. Not my fault right. *toss fringe* Eh. After that night, Princess Filifala is now not only my proclaimed Blog Queen but also my Dancing Queen hor.
• Mama in a jet plane to China for two weeks. We had the WHOLE GOD DAMN HOUSE TO OURSELVES, we rocked the house down that faithful night with yummilicious soup and great company! Woohoo! My Didi and future Sista-in-law can cook can! Come! Let’s rock the house down one more time before the dowager is back. =X
• My new maid is in the house. You have no idea how much I adore her. She managed to get in my princess’s good book in record time. And yeah! SHE HAS NO BAD BREADTH NOR B.O! I really count my blessing to have her. If there is one thing I want to rant…it has to be her neh neh. TMD. Bigger then mine.

See. I may not be blogging, but my colourful life is still nothing sorts of events.
 
OK. And you know what. I’m now selling some earrings / accessories racks to make ends meet. SO SAD RIGHT! For the past week, I’ve been frantically registering myself in forums, posting photos, up my threads. The intense of work is screaming murder!

And its official. I’m ditching my rack supplier after this round.

1. He has the audacity to shortchange me 3 racks.
2. His follow-up sucks big time.
3. He didn’ t adhere to the quantity I ordered from him.

Please ask him to run far far away if he ever sees me in the way. I swear to make a mince meat outta him if I ever catches him in sight!

Speaking of which. Reminds me to call and F him left right up and down later.

You know. Some people is like that. Bo gan buay tua han.
 
 
 
OK. I’m going to sell my racks in the next entry liao. SUPPORT ME K!

 

On Urgent Leave

Sorry folks! My blog bug is on urgent leave.

 

Expired news and Canon IXUS800 IS

My maid had kinda tender her resignation last week.
 
Just when things are beginning to fall in nicely.
 
 
In her love letter to my mommy, she is apparently not very pleased that:

1. She has to know her shortcoming from a third party (maid agent). She would have very much prefer us to tell her right at her face.
2.  She can’t help it about her bad breath and BO. BUT of course she didn’t state that in the letter lah. She cleverly phrase it as” I also want to be clean and tidy but I’m only a maid.” Errr…Oh well. I guess we made a grave mistake by being too honest with her. She . ish . hurt .

Wah rao. I swear I merely bought her the mouthrinse nia. I merely tugged a finger under my nose whenever she yawn inside the car, I didn’t even wind down the window can.
 
 
Anyway. I shall give her my blessing and all the best to her future endeavour. I don’t think I’m missing much either without her presence.
 
 
 
Eh. On a happier note hor. My replacement maid had 4 years of working experience in Hong Kong leh. Can speak minimum cantonese somemore.
 
 
Keeping my fingers crossed she can cope well with my lau bu’s nagging. And oh ya! Hopefully no bad breath and BO. *crossed fingers and toes*
 

**********

Yesterday dinner with two of my Poly besties was all brillant and such with all the intensive bitching and updates. UNTIL I dunno Infigaro or me lah, loose grip of my Canon IXUS 800IS , that it make a cartwheel, two front flips and a 3/4 twist back flip before it landed on the floor…motionless.

The len is spoilt. The warranty had expired. *clap clap*
 
 
Yeah! I’m going to have a new camera soon!
 
Sometimes, I really find it a blessing I can always see things from a different perspective. It makes me a happier person you know.

 

TAB 08/09/2007

It was…
 
 
 
 
 
 

 
TAB : Timo Abu Bakar’s 24th B’day on Sat.
 
Its because of his detestation for pork, that garnered him that nick – TAB aka Timo Abu Bakar.
 
He only had himself to blame. Orbigoot.
 
 
 
I shall long story cut short, we celebrated his b’day with a karaoke session, to ease our his craving.
 
 

 
He was not in the least delighted when I kid him that the 6 pcs of heavenly donuts from Donuts Factory was his Birthday present.
 
I have pictorial evident.
 
 
 

The picture speaks for itself.
 
Humpf. Had it be other people, they would have willingly kiss my feet in exchange for a bite of donut from Donuts factory! PUI!
 
And the best part is, HE DIDN’T SHARE THE HEAVENLY DONUTS WITH US!
 
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
 
Well done Timo…Well done! *clap clap*
 

  
Nah! The real pressie from ALL OF US
 
Excuse me. $130 worth of Fossil voucher can.
 
And ya! Before I forget. Praise to Princess Filifala for the wonderful artistic writting or she will stab me to death if I don’t give her credit!
 

 
And only did he lighted up seeing the SGD130 fossil voucher *roll eyes to heaven*
 
  
And if you thought that’s all… NO! NO! NO!
 

I even went the extra mile to buy him this thick yummillicious durian cake can!
 

 
And did he have the chance to make a wish…
 

 
And blow some candles
 
 
See if he still dare to say I’m his karma anot. PUI!
 
Apparently, the aroma of the durain cake was a tad overwhelming, we had complain from next room, and before we knew it, the cake was confined to the fridge. LOL.
 
Wah rao. They only state that durians are not allow. They didn’t mention durian cake also not allow wor.
 
 
OK. Enough of that lucky bastard birthday. Its now time for some actions in the karaoke room.
 

 
It took every ounce of my will not to rip her off her tights and boots. I was freezing my tits off in the room!
 
Lesson learnt. I can forget and leave my tits at home, I will also NEVER EVER forget my jacket again!
 

 
7th mth lah! I think he saw ghost.
 

 
I’m totally disgusted, I don’t even wanna talk about them can.
 

 
*cough* Don’t tell hubby about us k.
 

 
Faye Wong Vs Faye Tan.
 

 
That’s the attitude. Sing like there is no tomorrow.
 
 
PUI. Hope you had a memorable 24th Birthday.
 
 
Last but not least…
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 



 
 
MUAHAHAHAHAHAHA. HAPPY 24TH BIRTHDAY TIMO ABU BAKAR!
 
And where is my serial no.?
 

 

When will money drop from sky?

Yesterday alone. I spent:

1. $16.00 on cabbie from work to Orchard.
2. $47.50 on haircut.
3. $163.00 on Bobbi Brown.
4. $68 (After $20 Isetan voucher) on Clinque.

TOTAL SGD ROBBED OFF MY BANK ACCOUNT: SGD294.50
 
 
*glup* I no no how to tell Tokster. And its only like 7th of the month?
 
 
Anyway. No point crying over spill milk. There is only so much so I can do now, but to stay very optimistic and wait for money to drop from sky.
 
 
 
 
 

 
Ya. I know. The haircut is just another replica of my previous haircut.
 
How? Is this a sign, its time to change my stylist?
 
I miss having haircut with that WOW factor.
 
 
 And did you notice my bloodshot eyes?
 
I woke up at 6.30am…ya…I kid you not…6.30am this morning just to style my hair, and play with my corrector from Bobbi Brown, for my dark until cannot dark undereye circles.
 
But apparently I had applied a tad too much of the corrector…I look like I’m carrying two handbags under my eyes.
 
 
BUT STILL. Corrector is a must-have-or-die for hidding dark circles. Your concealer alone is not enough my dear.
 
Anyway. I will try to blog about the magic my corrector can do k. Hopefully soon enough.
 
 
And if you will excuse me… I need my caffeine fix now.
 
Waking up at 6.30am for a 29 years old is seriously no joke nowadays.
 
 
 
PS: I wanted to blog about the IBM workshop I attended yesterday, but I need my caffeine fix now or I will spout foam and die. YOU BEAR TO LET ME DIE?

 

Saggitarius

I’ve heard and in fact witness a tad too much (without me realising it)! 

I’m now officially condemning all Saggitarius species with penis! That’s it!

The two main reasons that incurred my wrath with Saggitarius species with penis :

1. They flirt with any species with virgina from three years old to eighty-three years old.
2. They want to make love to you, yet commitment phopic.

 I reckoned the above two points are suffice to label them as big fat BASTURD.
 
 
I count my blessing I had never dated a Sagi in my entire life.
 
Yes! I can hear all the Sagi species with penis denying vehemently and protesting for their innocent.
 
Haha. But don’t blame me. Don’t blame yourself either. Blame the star if you have to. LOL.
 
 
 
Wake up your idea, if you are dating or about-to-date a Sagi species with penis! Or worst! Lusting over one!

And yes. YOU…right… YOU…I’m talking about YOU! LOLLLL.
 
 
 
 
And if you happen to be any Sagi species with penis. STIR CLEAR FROM MY TENIA!
 
 
 
 
 
 
I also heard…Sagi are damn expert and good on *cough* you-know-what.
 
But don’t quote me. Have yet to try one myself. =X
 
 
 
 
So what do you have to speak for yourself? Mr Infigaro?

 

SICK

No! That’s not Tenia’s temperature. Its mine.

Its official. I’m sick.
 
 
Will I die?
 
Any last words for me?

 

SHUT THE F**K UP. Will ya?

I hate it when cabbie uncle tries a tad too hard to make small talk with me.
 
WORST! When they start telling you great-grandmother story why Woodbridge Hospital changed its name to IMH, when you merely and conveniently tell them Buangkok Link is beside IMH.
 
Dot. Dot. Dot. Dot. Dot.
 
 
And he had to take a freaking 10 mins to finally realised he had been talking to himself, did he eventually shut the fuck up.
 
 
My fault. My fault. If only I had not mentioned the three letters – I.M.H.
 
 
 
It was seriously all I could do not to stuff his mouth with my stinky socks I haven’t washed in 2 mths lor! I tell you.
 
 
 
 
Anyway I just realised that I will settle on the language to speak to the cabbie driver, from whatever radio channel he is tuning in. LOL.
 
But yesterday hor, that sibei talkative cabbie uncle proved me wrong, when he was tuning in to Class 95, but was yakking non-stop to me in mandarin wor.
 
 
OK. I don’t even know the rational behind, telling you all these. HAHA.
 
 
 
Anyway. I’m so expecting an impending full blown flu and fever.
 
WOOHOO! How fun!